PAINFUL ORDEAL BUT JUST READ
By Hon Jim Bonnnie
I thought Jeff Koinange was to interview president Obama, at least according to some people. I remember how Larry Madowo was ridiculed for “losing” to Jeff on the contest to interview the president of the free world and none did it better than one of my closest friends.
One of them, from the other side, told me to my face to follow Larry Madowo to hell and tell him to concentrate on hosting socialites. He was ready to show me the route or sponsor my flight to hell if I didn’t know the way. He was serious so I chose not to talk ill against Jeff in the debate because the guy would’ve beaten the hell out of me yet I didn’t want to welcome POTUS a wounded man.
In fact, he was punctuating every sentence with “fuck you my friend”. You can imagine for the two hours we were together how many times I was fucked up!. Up to this time, I hadn’t known that folks from that side of Kenya [Name of the region withheld] also used that phrase, “fuck you”. The manner he was stressing when pronouncing “fuck you” I thought the guy would have literally fucked me if had I been a lady.
He went ahead to call me a Luo fool and he made it clear that I will continue to be disappointed by the opposition and my “god” Raila Odinga (he pronounced this as someone who truly hates Raila and wanted to annoy me), not forgetting that he was spewing these insults on my face as he was swallowing a drink I bought with my money.
The way he was furious, I thought for a while that maybe he was a mong the judges who selected Jeff over Larry. When I told him that I doubt if that would be possible, he told me that I am a tribalist, that I am jealous of Kikuyu progress and he even called me an IDIOT – something that hurts me to date.
Please, help me ask my friend to receive my calls. Since Obama left, he has been ignoring my calls only responding with “I am in a meeting” texts.
JB the reigning Opus Dei