By Odumbe Isaak
Saitan is real I tell you. We’re supposed to believe that the home of the second most secure man in the 581, 309 sq. km of real estate that is Kenya was attacked by a machete wielding thug. A man whose family and assets are protected by the elite Recce Company who since the early 60’s have been trained by Israeli Special Forces. A man who is a heartbeat away from an institution and office that represents and symbolizes the unity and sovereignty of an entire nation. An institution and office – The Presidency – that will be protected at all costs.
A lone thug shoots an elite Recce Company officer at the DP’s home with his machete – Oh wait, maybe not. He got close enough to an elite soldier carrying an automatic rifle, a soldier who should understand that the only way he should lose his rifle is if it’s pried from his dead hand. The machete toting thug then shoots the officer for good measure and then looks for a hide out to fight to his death when the Calvary – and you know the entire trigger happy Recce Company are coming down to rain on you – checks in.
It takes 18 hours – think about that – 18 bloody hours to neutralize a lone ranger with a machete an 28 rounds of ammunition at best. Just to give you a comparison, consider the alternative response when some 4 terrorists attacked night revellers in London Bridge a few weeks ago. it took 8 minutes from the time the Sirkosky helo of the SAS Blue Thunder squad landed on Tooley Street for all the terrorists to be terminated with extreme prejudice. 8 minutes.
But for us, we have to go spraying bullets in the air – for what, I don’t know. Everyone in the world following this story by then could tell you that shooting in the air had absolutely no effect on a machete wielding lone thug who was holed up in a building still under construction in the compound. The only surprise is that after they killed him in that epic 18 hour battle, they didn’t find the NASA manifesto on the dead fella right along a letter of inspirational encouragement from Baba himself promising a special place for his soul in Canaan.
You know, every single day these two clowns come up with something even more stupid than the previous day. Whether it’s faking news and running them as BBC and CNN footage, or whether it’s providing Kenyans with more drama and vindio, I tell you na mbando. 10 days is a long time for political skulduggery.
Meanwhile, just in case anyone didn’t notice – Sugoi has just become the most secure green house in the country. While all of you were enjoying the movie and 18 hour man-hunt, other manenos were happening with choppers landing and security personnel and “equipment” being ferried to assist in the manhunt.
Have a dramatic day good people.