By E Tundura via FB
My pal and I are sitted at our usual joint Kwa-Lucy, three tables away, hidden and on your way to the urinals is another pal of ours known as Mike. He is with his Mpango wa Kando(MWK) embroiled in an animated conversation. It has been over an hour now and Mike has barely touched his White Cap. It must be something very serious. One of my pal, Maina, wonders loudly what they could be talking about.
“The only conversation I can have with my MWK is about money. Mara it is her cooking gas which needs refilling, or money for the salon or rent. I then finish my business,leave her the money and go!”.
We all nod in agreement. Peter asks us if any of us does porn with his MWK. We laugh as he details how they watch clips from his smartphone and then re-enact them in bed. Well,he is the youngest in our group at 29 years and can surely do some gymnastics.
I look at Nyaga, his MWK is older than us at almost 50yrs. He must have been looking for a motherly figure, someone almost twice the age of his missus/wife. I ask him what they talk about with her. He growl and sneer at me and I know he is annoyed. Fortunately, Mike soon joins us, he has already released his MWK. He looks distraught. He says;
“She’s pregnant ”
We all say in unison, “What?”
We are taken aback and astonished. I ask him; “Wasnt she also pregnant a time like now last month?”.
“Yes she was.She asked for 20k for abortion,I gave her.She’s again asking for a similar amount.”
We are all quiet for a while.Trying to digest this. We know Mike’s financial situation,his construction business was vibrant,till this county thing came around. He was given several roads to gravel,but the county has refused to pay him to date.Two years down the line.The banks came for him and he exhausted all his savings.
Now, it’s us his pals he relies on as he chase his cheque from Kisii county. We contributed the 20k last month,this month we have our own problems.Besides, Mike’s two kids in secondary school were at home recently,sent home for fees,is it their fees which should be paid or an abortion?. But Mike is crazy about this MWK. She is a second year at Kisii University Campaus and half his age at 20.
Maina,a medic in our group avers that the girl isn’t pregnant as it’s medically impossible to be pregnant after only a month.
“Statistically,it’s difficult to get pregnant.Consider that only 4 days in a month are the unsafe days.That is when a woman can catch pregnancy.All the other 24 days are safe and a woman can’t get pregnant.How possible is it then that someone who had an abortion last month on 5th can claim to be pregnant again?.
How short is her circle? and If at Marie Stopes the most professional in this town,an abortion is 7k,where is she getting this of 20k?.”
We all shake our heads in bewilderment and tell Mike that he’s having his legs pulled by this MWK.Nyangau suggests that Mike tell his MWK to keep the baby, Mike looks a bit shaken by that suggestion but accept to play along.
The following day we have drama at Kwa-Lucy.The witch comes holding hands with Mike and proceeds to insult and shout at us for misleading her boyfriend. She calls us jealousy old men who are envious of Mike.She shows us his ATM card and proceed to tell us how in charge she is. Mike looks like he’s in a trance. He doesn’t look at us as they walk off……