An Open letter to one Child, Njoki Chege
(Standing ovation)..clap clap clap.
You must be elated with your new found fame, I mean the whole country is talking about you. (Hongera kwako dada). You must be proud!!
I received a call from my 15 year old cousin this morning, she was crying hysterically asking for some slimming advice because she was fat and ugly and she didn’t want to end up a miserable ugly fat woman with a philandering husband. To cut a long story short, I had to tune on to classic, google you (sic) up and read your nonsense, that demeaning rubbish you call advice. Thanks to you, you have confirmed to a 15 year old girl that she is ugly and that inner beauty belongs to the hyenas. You have just confirmed to that overweight woman who is on fertility pills that are making her ”fat” because she cant get a baby that she is ugly and if her husband is cheating on her, she is to blame. That woman who has a disease that makes her overweight, she not only has to deal with cruel stares from the public but another dimwit blogger! You have (thanks to you again) insulted all stay home moms who took care of us and told them, you are lazy and ugly. Obviously those sleepless nights because the baby had a fever, colic, those warm meals and bedtime stories, warm cuddles, mean..boring and lazy! You went further and gave fashion advice that to look sexy one must wear heels! Child, u need therapy…a shrink? Dr Njenga can you hear me? You are one despicable demeaning cyber bully who has nothing to do with her writing skills other than demean women. Shame on you!
I couldn’t wait to see what you look like to write such a bold letter – and since fashion is my area of expertise, I first judged you on what you were wearing. Do you and me a favour, never give any advice as far as fashion is concerned. If you sat before a fashion judge, he would give you life. Are we clear hun?I am a retired model and a fashion designer, I would know a thing or two about fashion. You are crazy if you think that clothes make one sexy, tell you what, I can look just as sexy in an old sack picking mangoes under the rain just as I would in a Dubai fashion ranway in Jimmy Choo’s stilleto and a Gucci gown ( stuff I’m sure you have just seen on the magazines). Sexiness is an attitude.
First and foremost i wish to apologise to 90% of the women all over the world for this demeaning article. Not all skinny women are condescending. Not all of us lack grey matter between our ears. In actual fact this Child doesn’t even fit in the 10% skinny women category. All women are beautiful and God makes no junk.
Child, you speak about motherhood and yet you have no children. Marriage and you are still single. If you were my mama’s child she would give you a real ass whooping! I am a mother, so let me give you some advice and lets have a 1:1 if you will and if your skull aint too thick to absorb some of this wisdom:
1. Beauty comes in all sizes and shapes: I have never met an ugly woman in my entire life. Only women with an ugly attitude such as yours. You not only demean women, you are on a trip to empower cheats. Get off your high horse woman, you think you are better than other women just because a fashion magazine told you so? Deal with the karma that’s coming to you! Ask Harley Berry and Eva Longoria if they were fat when their husbands were cheating on them. Wise up child! Wise up! Ever heard of Oprah, Queen Latifah, Rogo Manduli & Margaret Kenyatta?
I got news for you, in some countries you would not only be considered ugly but hideous! Beauty comes in different shapes and sizes.
2. Stay home moms: Child, try to spend one weekend with a toddler, if you come out alive we can have this conversation. I mean a toddler puppy coz I would never trust an air head like you to take care of a human baby. Stay home moms are lazy and ugly? Hmmm….must be the reason Michelle Obama gave up her kick ass law career to be a full time mom? One more thing, I did spend a part of my life in front of the cameras, professional makeup and designer clothes and shoes. They didn’t make me feel more beautiful than when I am at home in my PJ’s, no make up and bare feet.
3. Stretch marks and scars: If this one wasn’t so pathetic it would be laughable. I have a beautiful scar from my C- Section. I adore it :). When I was pregnant I had more stretch marks than I could count. It’s the price that comes with the tag mommy. Those don’t bother us moms…but I can see how a stretch mark would bother a silly air- head who thinks outer beauty is all there is to. An air head who if looks are anything to go by and is all she was depending on her career, then that career would never take off! Get pregnant first and we will have this conversation – ( I pray to the fertility gods that they give you the appetite of 10,000,000 pigs). Amen!!
4. Nagging: Don’t ask who Sheila is? I was a stay home mom for 9 months. Hardest but most rewarding job in the Universe.My baby kept me so busy i didnt even know where my underwear was leave alone where his phone was. If a woman is snooping i have found, she is often right. (asiefunzwa na mamake atafunzwa na ulimwengu). You can thank me later, child!
5: Fashion Sense: You don’t have it! Stop giving fashion advice. If your attitude didn’t suck so..I would have given you free classes and outfits…oh and if you must know why mom’s are always in t shirts and PJ’s..babies puke and shit like they get paid to do it. Yes, we get puked on and shat on more than we bargained for. Get it, child? Heels? Honey, try wearing those with a 2 year old :D. Wish you luck!
Child, obviously you have been watching too much Kim Kardashian. Good luck with that! Welcome to the real world. If you don’t like them ”fat” you can kiss their fat ass. I know you already have a mental picture of me as the woman who put on so much weight after she gave birth. Nah…I’m a small woman because genetics demanded so. I’m smaller than you actually and you give small women a bad name. I can help with your pathetic sense of fashion but i cant help you with your issues…hence you need a SHRINK….asap! I celebrate all women, big, small, short, tall…all women are beautiful! ”FAT” women need a gym like you need a Shrink beloved :).
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